Seeking the Doubts

I am face to face with my enemy looking into its petrifying eyes. Its confidence sends a shiver down my spine. Its cold-blooded calm look increases the fluttering in my chest. Its deceptive tranquility causes a shortness of my breath and each time I try to breathe, I can feel an anxiety attack very close to shutting me off.

My new nemesis is really intimidating but I cannot prevent myself from looking at it, it is very reassuring. When my eyes meet its eyes; I feel I am also holding the power; I am also a warrior in this fight, and I can influence its outcome.

My oldest fortresses are the most fragile and cannot hold long against the first wave of deliberations; childhood’s beliefs and principles fall like a puff of dust that vanishes as its particles move away from each other. I lost my youth’s doctrine yet felt more content.

With each loss, I feel more alive. What a dilemma!

I stayed in the game face to face with my enemy, but now I demand it to destroy all my fortresses. I have a deep yearning for my freedom.

When our needs meet with our opponent’s power, we unite, rather than fight. Doubts can be an eternal enemy or a perpetual friend once we decide what role it holds.

Destroy all the past’s delusions and build your future with wisdom and love; let your doubts help you find the way and help your doubts to believe in your judgments; hand in hand you will reach the light; and only there you can breathe.

Dana Obeid